Operation Smile

Today I embarked on another hour long drive to Operation Smile which is an orphanage near the second largest city of Trinidad; San Fernando.  There were about 45 children there with the youngest being 4 and the oldest was 15.  We got to spend a few hours of the afternoon sharing the love of Jesus with these precious children.  We played some games, sang some songs, did a short drama, shared a story and a testimony, did a few magic tricks, and then spent the rest of the time just getting to know them.  There were about 5 or 6 kids that kind of flocked to me and took me around showing me the goats, and the playground, and their rooms, and various other things around their facility.  I had a lot of fun being taken around and hearing their laughter as they talked with me, but there were a couple of girls in particular that I spent most of my time with.  They were sisters, Alia and Diana.  They were 8 and 11 and we sat inside one of the slides on the playground and talked about all kinds of things.  They asked me questions about the ship and about my home and my family, my favorite fruit, if I dyed my hair or if it was really this color…all kinds of things.  Our time there went by so quickly and it was hard to say goodbye as it often is when God gives you a love for these people in such a short time and then you leave knowing that you will more than likely never see them again.  You just hope and pray with all your heart that something….just one little thing that you did or that you said while with them will in some way impact their lives and their hearts, if not now, years down the road and it will cause them to seek for and to find Jesus for themselves.  

Back to Rehab

Today I was given the opportunity to go to a woman’s rehab center called the Serenity House.  There were 10 women living there who are or have been addicted to drugs or alcohol or had been living out on the streets and seeking a place to get their lives back together.  Nine of us girls from the ship drove about 2 hours to spend the afternoon with these ladies and it was such an amazing time.  After introducing ourselves I sang a song for them.  It was a song called Come to Me by Jill Paquette.  The first couple of lines go something like this: “Broken and battered your confidence shattered but I am still here.  The things that you cling to they seem to just bring you right back to your fears.”  And the song goes on to talk about how Jesus is calling us to come to Him and everything will be alright and you will find love and healing through Him.  The women really seemed to enjoy it.  After my song, one of our girls shared her testimony.  She has had a pretty rough life and has a story that these women could relate to really well and after she finished sharing each of the 10 women there began sharing each of their stories with us.  It was amazing to see such openness and honesty and it was so good to just be real with each other as we all shared our different struggles and battles and how and in Whom we find hope and strength.  The lady that acts as the director of the place shared with us that she was ready to give up and close down because she felt like she wasn’t really accomplishing anything and she was just getting ready to have a meeting with the women to discuss some options when we pulled up.  She told us that we had brought her a new hope and motivation to continue the work.  Please be praying for her and the women there, as this is the only women’s shelter of its kind in all of the English speaking Caribbean.  During our time there I also had the opportunity to pray for a 16 year old girl who had been raped by a relative and gotten pregnant and had a 2 week old daughter.  What a precious pair those two are and she seems to have a genuine relationship with Christ and asked me to pray for her mom who is not saved.  I hurt inside for these women and the lives they have lived and the pain and the brokenness and the addictions they have fallen prey to, some of it because of their own choices and some of it because of unfortunate circumstances.  But these women were so open to hearing and talking about the Lord and we were able to encourage each other to never give up, to keep fighting the battle, and to trust God to provide the victory.  I tried so much to help these women know and understand that they were beautiful and precious and worthy of love.  The place they live in is in desperate need of repair and our team is really hoping that we can send some others out there to do some work for them and we would really like to have the opportunity to bring these women back to the ship with us and host them for a day and let them share a meal with us while we are there.  Please be praying that God would orchestrate that for us, as it would be such a blessing!

From University to Rehab

This morning a group of us traveled to one of the universities in the Port of Spain.  The original plan was to spend a couple of hours walking around the campus praying, handing out tracts, and starting up conversations with some of the students with the purpose of sharing our faith.  Upon arriving and speaking to the man in charge we were informed that we would not be allowed to do that because it goes against the schools’ policy.  We had brought some literature with us and were given permission to set up a table in one of the lounges and if students happened to walk in and approach us then we could talk with them.  I think this actually ended up working to our advantage because we had a number of people come through who had got word we were there and were curious about who we were and what we were doing.  God definitely worked everything out.

Later in the afternoon my team was picked up by a couple of men who run a place called the Rebirth Center.  It is a rehabilitation center for men who are or have been addicted to drugs and/or alcohol, who are homeless, unemployed, or any number of things.  This place was in the middle of nowhere.  They own quite a bit of land that is surrounded by the mountains and the jungle and they have a garden where they grow a lot of their own food and have a number of various jobs and leadership positions for the men to fulfill during their stay.  What an amazing time I had here.  There was probably somewhere between 30 and 40 men and we did a short program for them.  We introduced ourselves and the ship, had an interactive sketchboard message talking about brokenness and how Jesus came to heal our brokenness and then one of our guys shared his testimony and by the end of our little program we had 8 men come up to give their lives to Christ and we got to pray for each of them individually, Amen!  After this happened there were many others who were still interested in knowing more, so we had a spontaneous question and answer time where the men asked all kinds of spiritual questions.  Then a couple of the men that were already believers chose to come up front and share their stories with us and a couple of other guys each sang a song for us.  It was an amazing time.  Afterwards we had the chance to hang out and chat with them and some of them went and cut down some coconuts and sliced them open with their machete and passed it to me to drink; nothing quite like fresh coconut water!  I found it very easy to talk to these men, or rather they found it very easy to talk to me and I mostly just listened.  Our bus driver had to come tell me 3 different times that we needed to leave.  I could have stayed there all night, it was such a beautiful place and the guys have such crazy stories and it was such an amazing opportunity to share a bit of hope with them.  What a blessing to be used by God!

Laventille, Trinidad

After driving through the twisting mountain roads of Trinidad, my small team of 6 people arrived in Laventille, one of the most dangerous cities in Trinidad.  Most local people try to avoid this area as it is known for its high crime rate and violence.  We came to entertain a group of about 15 children who attend an after school program in the area.  After going around and having everyone introduce themselves, we took the children outside and played a few games, told a short story with a gospel message, shared about the ship and what we do, and sang some songs.  The kids were so sweet and even taught us a few of their own songs and actually made us sing them alone just to make sure we had actually learned them.  Afterwards, we had a little bit of time left to just hang out with the kids and love on them.  Right before we left I had a couple of the younger boys call me over and made me bend down and they each gave me a kiss on the cheek…too cute!

Ship Family

Every Tuesday night is ship family night. Everyone onboard belongs to a particular ‘ship family’ who get together to share a meal once a week and spend the evening together getting to know each other, going out in the port, watching a movie, playing a game, etc… It’s a good opportunity to get to know some other people and feel a little more like you belong to a family. This is a picture of my family….the Crowe family. We have lots of fun together!

Independence Day and Farewell

Today was Trinidad and Tobago’s Independence Day. The day was complete with lots of loud music, crowds of people, street vendors, and fireworks. We had a nice Indian dinner together as ships company and met together in the Logos Lounge for a farewell/thank you service for our director onboard. Him and his family are going to be leaving in a couple of weeks and going back home to Australia to continue working with OM there. After the service we all gathered up on Deck 9 to take in Trinidad and Tobago’s fireworks. They launched them from the dock directly across from our ship. It was a pretty amazing show! Any time I see fireworks anywhere other than home I am always left a bit disappointed because no one can do fireworks like Bettendorf, but I have to say, Tobago put up a pretty good fight. I was very impressed with their finale, not only was it almost too much for the eyes to handle but they also set off some pretty loud explosives, it was awesome!!! We ended the night back down in the dining room with an ice cream sundae bar. All in all, it was a good day of celebration.

I'm still alive!

Wow! 2 Months. I am so sorry I have not been keeping you updated. Those of you who were actually following my blog have probably given up on me by now, but don’t give up completely. I’m back! And I will try to do my best to give you regular updates again so that you all can feel like you are sharing in my journey. The last 2 months in bullet form: a very brief summary…

• Participated in some great ministry in the port of Cardiff. I got to help in giving out food to some of the homeless and spent the evening in the streets talking with many of them. I was amazed at how much they opened up and were willing to share their stories. Both times I went I was given the chance to pray with someone and felt so much joy in my heart that I could give them a piece of hope. I pray that God will complete the work that was started.
• Survived a smolder fire that started in the toilet paper storage room onboard the ship while sailing from Cardiff to London. Our fire team responded quickly and got things under control with no one injured and very little damage.
• Spent a few weeks in London ministering to the multi-cultural population that exists there. Got to take a tour of the city in a red double-decker bus and prayed for the needs of the city and for God to intervene.

• Got to help lead worship for the official opening of our Hope Theater on Deck 3. This is where many of our onboard ministries and programs now take place. It can seat about 400 people.
• Celebrated the 4th of July with the American’s onboard in Cork, Ireland. Was great to celebrate our countries freedom but more so to celebrate the freedom we have in Christ and to pray for others to experience that freedom.
• Spent 14 days sailing across the Atlantic. What an amazing time together as a ship community. God did many great things during the voyage. We came together in unity and experienced rest and refreshment from our Savior. We enjoyed quiet days, work days, family night, barbeque’s outside on Deck 9, prayer nights, worship nights, movie nights, fun/talent night, saw dolphins and whales, beautiful sunsets, nothing but ocean for miles and miles and so much more. I think I have been mostly cured of my sea-sickness (praise the Lord) and was able to really enjoy the voyage. 

• Arrived safely to the Caribbean and just finished our first port of St. Vincent’s and the Grenadines. We had over 43,000 people come onboard the ship. We sold more books in that one port than we sold in the last 4 ports in Europe. We sent out 22 sports teams, about 30 church teams, and saw over 100 people accept Christ, Amen!
• Arrived in Grenada this morning and are preparing for the ministry here. We have our official opening tomorrow and are looking forward to all that God is going to accomplish during our stay.

Indispensable Faith

Hebrews 11:6- "But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarded of those who diligently seek Him."  Our relationship with each other is one based on confidence and confidence rests on character.  God is a being of supreme moral excellence, possessing in perfection all of the qualities that make up holy character.  He deserves and invites the unreserved confidence of every man.  Any good and proper relationship to Him must be one of confidence and of faith.  Where there is no faith, it is impossible to please Him.  The fallen nature of man began with a loss of confidence of faith in God.  Man questioned the very character and integrity of God and therefore opened the doors to every kind of evil and darkness.  Only a restored faith can bring a restored relationship.  John 8:12- "I am the light of the world, He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life."  1 John 5:10 says he who does not believe God has made Him a liar...  A God who lies is a God without character, and where there is no character there can be no confidence.  These things cause me to ask some questions.  Do you think there needs to be a balance betwee our confidence or faith in God and our fear of God?  Or is our fear of God something that we only experience at the beginning of our relationship with Him?  As we come to know God more and our love is being perfected and fear is cast out (1 Jn. 4:18), how do we balance coming before God in confidence still recognizing His position of being a Holy God deserving of our complete devotion and our position of being so unworthy?  Or perhaps we can come to Him as a Holy God in confidence because He has made us holy and clothed us with His righteousness.  Hmm...something to think about!  We need to repent and give a sincere apology to God for distrusting Him for so long and by faith, throw ourselves upon Christ in complete confidence and this will achieve reconciliation between God and man.  We need to allow the grace of God to meet us where we are and to change us from what we are sorry we've become into what we are fervently longing to be.  My soul is hungry for more of Him and I pray that I will learn more of how to be wise in the wisdom of God and that with the help of His Holy Spirit I can learn to follow and obey the Truth no matter what it may cost.  

Cherry Red

One part of ship life is being prepared for every situation. About once a week we have a drill to help us practice for these different situations and this morning we had a ‘cherry red.’ This is the type of emergency situation that requires us to get off the ship and muster at different stations outside on the quayside. Our biggest challenge if this emergency every happened is all the visitors we have on Deck 4, our ‘experience deck.’ Because I work in the I-café, I am considered to be deck 4 personnel and had to participate in this mornings drill. They sent all of ships crew down to our deck and then set off the alarm. I had to put on my bright orange vest and florescent yellow hat and escort everyone off the ship as quickly and as safely as possible while also sweeping the entire deck, checking every nook and cranny for any person that may be hiding or refusing to get off the ship and do my best to get them out. They purposely plant people in different places to make sure we check ever area thoroughly and also ask other individuals to be difficult so that we can practice our crowd control. I thought it went quite well and it was a good opportunity to get an idea of some of what we may have to deal with in case of a real emergency.

Northern Ireland

Once again, much time has passed since my last post. Life gets so busy and its hard to find time to share my stories with you, but here's the latest.  Yesterday was my day off and the first chance that I have had to actually get out and see some of the countryside of Northern Ireland. God blessed us with a beautiful sunny day and I very much enjoyed my explorations.  I am such a big kid when it comes to seeing new places and exploring God's creation.  I crave for adventure and am always so excited when presented with the opportunity to explore new places.  Yesterday I hiked around the Irish seaside and walked across a suspended rope bride over the sea to a little island where I enjoyed frolicking in the grass and flowers and taking in the fresh sea breeze.  I also had the opportunity to go to Giant's causeway: an area of about 40,000 interlocking basalt columns, the result of an ancient volcanic eruption.  Here I enjoyed the beautiful scenery, climbing on the rocks, and kneeling beside the sea watching the tides come rushing in and crashing into the rocks and enjoying the occasional splash of salty sea water on my face.  The last stop of the day was to Dunluce castle.  Here I ran down a set of stone steps to the side of the castle and was torn in three directions because there was so much to explore (the girls I was with laughed at my childish excitement).  After climbing a steep hillside and successfully getting grass stains all over my jeans in my attempt to get as close to the ruins as possible, I stood on the hilltop next to the castle wall (where one or two steps to the right would have sent me tumbling to my death on the rocks in the sea) I found myself lost in history.   This particular castle dates back to 1500 and 1600 (type it into google if you're really interested).  It was crazy to think that one day people lived there and fought battles to protect their land.  By the time I arrived back to the ship I was exhausted but thanking God for the amazing day and I am sure that He delighted in my joy of His creation. 

(Check out my facebook for more pictures!) 

Random Happenings...

Wow! Its been a long time since I've posted anything. Sorry to those of you who faithfully follow my blog and read my stories. The lapse in entries is due partially to my own lack of discipline and laziness but also in part to the fact that my internet access was extremely limited for the last few weeks and I haven't been able to get online much.  So in an attempt to try to catch you up on my life in the last 3 weeks (which is almost impossible), here is a list of some of the random happenings in my life lately.

1) Spent a couple days exploring the beautiful country of Scotland with all its historical buildings, beautiful lochs, glens, forests, hills,  and castles that made me feel like I had stepped back in time.

2) Worked in the cafe onboard

3) Celebrated my 26th birthday and felt very blessed with the many friends that God has given me on this ship that helped make my day special.

4) Celebrated Easter Sunday with a sunrise service out on deck 9 followed by an amazing brunch with all of ships company.  Was a great time to reflect and remember the sacrifice God made in sending His Son to die in our place so that we can live with Him by faith because of His grace.

5) Spent more time working in the cafe

6) Set sail for the Faroe Islands and tried to enjoy the couple days of relaxation despite the uncomfortableness that sailing seems to bring me.

7) Spent 16 hours with some locals being taken all over the islands.  Saw some historical sights, beautiful scenery, had a picnic lunch, climbed along waterfalls, saw lots of sheep, had a successful whale hunt, went bowling,  climbed rocks and hills,  jumped on a jumping pillow, and had an amazing dinner and time of fellowship with a Faroese family.

8)Work, work, and more work.

9) Tried whale meat for the first time.  Wouldn't really recommend it but at least I can say I've tried it.  My trip to the Faroe's would not be complete without trying whale :)

10) Going out tonight to a women's gathering with 3 other girls from the ship and we'll be sharing some testimonies, ship stories, doing some special music (done by me), and just enjoying a time of fellowship and encouragement.

And there you have it.  A brief summary of my last 3 weeks.  For whatever reason, the internet is not letting me post any pictures on here right now but for those of you who are interested and haven't already seen them, I have most of my pics in different albums on my facebook.  All my Scotland pictures are up there and my Faroe Island pictures will hopefully be there within the next week or two.

Deeply Engaged

There are times when I find myself deeply engaged in thoughts of God and my life in Him.  Deep thoughts that take me to new places and help me in beginning to discover more of who God truly is.  Today has been one of those days and I am choosing to share my ponderings in hopes that they will encourage you to think more deeply and to take time to discover anew all that God is and wants to be in your life.  In my writing, I do not mean to draw any sure or solid conclusions, but rather to simply share where my mind has been and would openly receive any of your reactions or thoughts on the matter.  

The phrase 'the unconditional love of God' has become cliche and is something I think we use all too often devoid of any real meaning, and it therefore loses its power and we end up with hearts that remain unchanged by its truth.  It is so easy to gain intellectual knowledge of God without allowing it to affect our hearts.  "Until the love of God that knows no boundary, limit, or breaking point is internalized through personal decision; until the furious longing of God seizes the imagination; until the heart is conjoined to the mind through sheer grace, nothing happens.  The wild, unrestricted love of God is not simply an inspiring idea.  When it imposes itself on mind and heart with the stark reality of ontological truth, it determines why and at what time you get up in the morning, how you pass your evenings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, and who you hang with; it affects what breaks your heart, what amazes you, and what makes your heart happy."  The thought that God loves me as I am and not as I should be requires a re-thinking and a readjustment of my thoughts of myself.  As I grow in my life of faith, I feel a shift in my images of who God is and who I am.  How radically my image of God is changed when I begin to take seriously how deeply and passionately and unconditionally He loves me.  And how radically I must work through my own self image as I try to accept myself as loveable by God.  Christ emptied Himself, cried out from His heart with nails in His hands, and poured out His blood for us that we might believe in His deep love for His children.  How is it that we have come to imagine that Christianity consists primarily in what we do for God?  Our Christianity should never begin with what we do for God, but should always begin with what God has done for us and what He has achieved for us in Christ Jesus.  In a moment of prayer to my Father this morning, lifting my hands to Him and declaring myself as belonging to Him, I felt myself being embraced in His loving arms and being given the desire to live in His smile and to hold tight to His every word as I continue engaging in the battle of letting go of myself and clinging to the one who loves me unconditionally and has come to claim me as His own!  Abba, I belong to You!

Complicated Simplicity

Took some time to take a walk this morning on my own. The sun is shining and its a beautiful day. A bit cool but warm enough to go out in a long sleeve shirt and a jacket. I walked to the beach and found myself a nice rock near the waters edge to sit and read my Bible.  Been spending some time reading through Colossians and thought I would share some of my random thoughts with you all.

Christianity is so complicated in its simplicity.  I find myself being able to understand why so many people turn to other religions, because every other religion requires you 'to do' something where Christianity requires nothing but faith.  God makes it so simple for us to have relationship with Him. We don't have to do anything to earn our salvation or to prove ourselves worthy to God.  Christ has made us worthy.  He has already done the work for us when He hung on the cross taking on the sins of the world as His own.  It has truly been finished!  All we have to do is to accept His gift of grace.  I think that once we really understand this, the more we will want to serve Him.  It will be a service done out of love rather than a service to prove ourselves or as an effort to make Him love us more.  He has loved us with His life and continues to pour His life into us.  For in Him we are made complete.  For some reason this somehow doesn't seem like enough...to just walk in faith.  Is this an issue of pride in my life?  Is it proof that I truly don't understand the sufficiency of Christ?  In my wanting or feeling like I need 'to do' something.....anything to give back to Him, am I suffering from a need to feel in control?  He has done the work and it is our job to follow Him in love and obedience.  Colossians says we have been buried and raised with Christ and we are no longer subject to the regulations of this world.   We have been made alive in Him.  Christ IS our life!  Is He my life?  Are others seeing Him or are they seeing me?  This journey of faith continues to be a mystery to me.  "God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is Christ in you, the hope of glory."  God is helping me to understand Him more and I continue to be amazed by who He is and how much He loves me and has already accomplished for me so that I can have the peace of God in my heart and the hope of the glory to come!

Community

"If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin." (I John 1:7)  I have found myself so encouraged and so blessed these last 3 days by the community that exists on this ship.  Friday, Saturday, and today were days full of fellowship with my brothers and sisters onboard and it has been so refreshing.  God has blessed me richly in such a short time with people that I can really talk to and who can tell when I'm having a bad day and will drop everything to listen or will pray for me at that moment no matter where we are or what we're doing.  I've been so encouraged and challenged by others opening up to me and those around them in a real, honest, and transparent way and how others come around them in support, without an attitude of condemnation or disapproval, but rather one of love and acceptance and forgiveness....all qualities of God that in some ways I feel like I'm starting to really understand for the first time.  Coming here as a missionary, you feel like you're going to have awesome times and you're gonna be strong and just shine your light for Jesus (which does happen) but you are also confronted with yourself.  You realize (or are rather reminded) that you don't have it all together and neither does anybody else on this ship.  Everyone has weaknesses, and everyone has those things they struggle with, and everyone is stuck in a world where sin has a hold on all of us.  But, while we all battle against Satan and against our sinful nature we can have confidence because Jesus has already won the battle for us and His grace that was given through the blood that He shed is sufficient to cover all our filth and has made us clean.  We have victory!  In the end we are still His and there is nothing that can snatch us out of His hand and take away our salvation.  Praise the Lord for a happy ending!  But until that day when He defeats evil once and for all and locks it up for eternity we have a war to fight and it is one that we can not fight alone!  We need each other and I am so grateful for the body that He has made me a part of in this time and place.

Picture of the Day

I absolutely love this picture and had to share it! I took it while out on a walk this morning.  I'm not sure exactly what it is but it's one of those pictures that evokes emotion.  Please leave your comments and let me know what it makes you feel or think about.  Perhaps that seems like a strange request to some of you, but sorry, it's the artist in me :)   

Coffee Shops or Cafe's and Coke or Cola

After a very miserable 30 hours of not feeling well and puking out everything that was in me, I have arrived in my next port...Scheveningen, Netherlands.  We will be here for the next 3 weeks and have lots of things planned during our stay.  Its a very beautiful port.  The beach is about 2 minutes down the road, the main city is about a 15 minute walk and we are about a 1 hour train ride away from Amsterdam.  Looking forward to exploring more of the city and walking along the beach on Friday as it is my day off.  Granted the beach isn't quite as fun in winter as it is in the warmth of summer, but I still find it beautiful and love listening to the crash of the waves along the shoreline!  This port is definitely much different from the small village of Harlingen that we just left.  We are definitely in a bigger city and have already discovered that if you walk into a 'coffee shop' and order a coke, you will not be getting a bottle of soda but rather a plastic bag full of cocaine!  You think I'm joking, but I'm totally serious!  Come check it out for yourself!   In this area, if you are interested in having a good coffee or some other similar beverage and pastry it is highly advised that you go to a cafe not a 'coffee shop,' and if you want a soda it is called a cola in this area!  Oh, the things you learn when traveling the world!  

Baker for a Day

Today I had kind of an odd shift.  Every third thursday I am on what they call the X shift and we usually work from 8-5 and its a day of deep cleaning the whole galley and dining room area.  But today, I was lucky enough to be chosen to help in the bakery.  So while my whole team spent the day scrubbing and cleaning who knows what, I spent 8 hours baking.  It was actually a lot of fun but not an easy job.  Everyday they bake 70 loaves of bread for ships company and lots of cakes and cookies and such to serve to our visitors who stop by the I-Cafe down on deck 4.  So during my time today I cracked over 450 eggs, helped make enough cookie dough for 1,000 cookies that turn out to be about the size of my hand (now thats a lot of dough).  I also helped make, bake, and decorate 12 chocolate cakes, 12 coffee cakes, and 10 fruit cakes.  By the time I was finished I was so covered in batter and icing :)  All was going perfectly well until I started having to cover things and put them in the freezer.  Now this freezer is one of those walk-in freezers that you see on the movies, you know, the kind that you could hide a dead body in! Kinda creepy!  I really think that the giant plastic wrap and the plastic things that hang in the entry way of the freezer had a conspiracy against me!  The plastic wrap just would not cooperate for anything and every time I went to walk into the freezer, I swear the plastic came alive and grabbed at me and tried to keep me from walking through and then did everything they could to grab the cakes out of my hands and send them crashing to the floor while dropping chunks of ice on my head!  I'm serious!  It was quite the battle, but in the end I prevailed!! 

Thoughts to Ponder

So, I know its been a while since I've done a post. I've had this one prepared for a while now but I guess I've just been too lazy to actually put it up. Anyway. These are some thoughts out of a book that I was reading called 'Hunger for Reality.' I thought they were good and worth sharing.

We need a constant hunger and thirst for the nature of Christ to be reproduced in us. We need too, an awareness of the unending spiritual warfare surrounding us. We who have Christ's eternal life need to throw away our own lives. This readiness can come as we pray. As Christians we know that we walk daily in a wilderness world, but the attractions of the wilderness need not walk in us. Whenever they intrude through our eyes or ears or minds, the citizen of the Promised Land must pray: "Lord, I used to enjoy that diversion in slavery, but I have died to that in Christ, hold me in your rest and resurrection life." It is ours for the asking and the trusting. The promised land of rest on this earth is not for sleeping; its for fighting-but it is the place where you hear God say: "I shall fight for you." Opposition, danger, temptations, and hardships surround you, but your spirit rests in the fortress of Gods love and power. Will you choose this sanctuary instead of trying to straddle the Jordan and keep one foot in the world?

The North Sea

I officially despise the North Sea! I guess it is notorious for having rough waters and the voyage from Gothenburg, Sweden to Harlingen, Netherlands was no exception.  I will definitely be taking sea-sick pills for the voyage from the Netherlands to Scotland as we will be on the North Sea once again.  I was lucky enough to have my day off yesterday but sadly it was mostly spent on my bed in my cabin.  It is the only place where I didn't feel dizzy.  Anytime you got up to walk around, you couldn't walk straight and you sometimes had to hold onto something to keep yourself from losing your balance and falling over.  All through the morning and the afternoon, if you looked out the window all you could see was water and the very next second all you could see was sky.  Its a strange feeling to try to describe to someone who's never experienced it.  The best thing I can come up with is this....You know that silly silo ride you find at six flags, the one that spins you round and round till the floor drops out and you stay against the wall?  Well, it kind of feels like stepping off of one of those.  Your whole world is spinning and in constant motion and there's nothing you can do about it.  I have never been quite so thankful as I was this morning to be outside on one of the upper decks and to have the waters calm and to watch us pull into our port, feeling so much more like myself again.  LAND!!  One of my favorite things is to watch us pull into each new port and to see a little bit of the city waiting to be explored and thinking of all the people that we will have the chance to reach with the gospel. Its what makes the rough voyages worth it.  As I was laying in my bed yesterday, I spent a little bit of time reading thru the last few chapters of Acts, when Paul was out at sea and they got shipwrecked on Malta.  My experience made that whole story come a little more alive for me and I felt like I could understand his journey a little better.  The last 2 verses of the book read this, "Then Paul dwelt two whole years in his own rented house, and received all who came to him, preaching the kingdom of God and teaching the things which concern the Lord Jesus Christ with all confidence, no one forbidding him."  As I am dwelling on this ship(my home) for the next two years, I pray that we will receive all who come to us and that I will be able to preach God's truth and love with all confidence not letting anything hold me back!

Maiden Voyage

Yesterday through a miracle of God, we were able to set sail and we began our maiden voyage, leaving Denmark and headed for Sweden. It was about a 15-hour voyage and thankfully a smooth one. Every one was so distracted through the afternoon and evening as this is the first time ever sailing for most people. All night people would randomly run over to the window to see what we were passing by or passing under. No signs of seasickness for me on this voyage, yah! We’ll see how I survive on some of other ones. Most of the time I couldn’t even tell we were moving until I laid in my bed for the night. It wasn’t anything too extreme but every so often I could feel a slight movement, it kind of felt like I was being rocked to sleep. It was actually pretty relaxing and I slept wonderfully. This morning in devotions we were entering Sweden and we passed by so many rock formations and lighthouses, it was beautiful! I think I’m going to enjoy being a sailor!

A Quiet Sunday

I have a day off today and it was so nice to sleep in and take my time getting up and around. They decided to cancel breakfast today and do brunch instead and to move the sunday morning service to this evening so that all of ships company could get a little extra rest.  It has been such a blessing so far.  I met up with a couple girls after breakfast that I haven't got to spend much time with since we all started our jobs and we went for a walk to the beach. Its about a 15 minute walk from the ship and even in the middle of winter, the beach is beautiful!  It was so calm and peaceful and good to allow God's creation to speak quietly into my heart.  One of the girls said she felt like we should pray.  So right there, sitting on the beach the three of us shared how things have been going for each of us...what's been good and what's been difficult and we spent some time praying for each other and made a pact to get together regularly and to help keep each other accountable.  It's so nice to have found a couple girls that I can really be myself with and share things on a little deeper level.  God is so good and always gives us so much more than we deserve!  Take some time today to thank Him for all the ways He has blessed your life and shown His love to you!

The Slaughter

Today was the big game. PST Birkedal vs Logos Hope in a battle on the soccer field. It's tradition for each new PST joining the ship to play a soccer game against the Logos Hope team. The last PST lost 8 to 0 and we decided to keep the tradition with a final score of 11 to 1.  It was horrible! They killed us!  But in our defense it was a very muddy and wet field and the opposing team had uniforms and soccer cleats and we came just as we were; a definite disadvantage.  We were slipping and sliding all over the place and I think the only thing we really accomplished was getting covered in mud.  But even if we did embarrass ourselves, it was still fun to get outside and get some exercise!  Maybe we'll get another chance to prove ourselves when the conditions are better.

My New Job

After almost an entire month of training the new group joining Logos Hope, known as PST Birkedal finally received our job assignments on Wednesday. We have all been waiting for this day for a long time. Not everyone was placed in their first choice of a job but everyone seemed pretty happy to finally be working on the ship. I am officially a galley girl. I will be spending my days in the kitchen and dining hall cleaning, doing dishes, and helping prepare the meals for all of ships company. Yesterday I helped get some food ready for a fancy dinner they had onboard this evening which included making 10 gallons of caesar salad dressing and some homemade ice cream, both turned out quite delicious! I had a very encouraging conversation with the executive chef my first night of work. He had asked me what I was doing before coming to the ship and I shared with him that I had been working as a shift manager at Starbucks for the last 2 ½ years, to which he replied “would you be interested in working at the I-Café onboard?” The I-Café is our onboard coffee shop that is used when in ministry. It’s not open except for special occasions right now, but once we set sail it will be open just about everyday. I was very excited about this opportunity and told him I would love to work in the café instead. Would appreciate your prayers for that to come together for me. He said he thought I could count on getting the job; it was just a matter of timing. Yah!! Until then I will enjoy the time I have in the galley. It’s a fun team of people to work with and a fairly laid back atmosphere. We get to listen to music and often sing and dance along to the song as we prepare the food. So far most of ship life is a blast!

Basic Safety Training

Tomorrow is my last day of basic safety training.  I can't believe that I'm almost done! I thought the time would never come.  The last couple of days have been pretty fun though.  We had a day on fire safety and we got to go for a little field trip to the middle of who knows where and got to practice putting out fires with all the different kinds of extinguishers.  Yesterday I spent 3 hours at the pool doing all kinds of drills. We did a 5 meter jump into the water, had to climb onto and flip over a capsized 25 person life raft, put on and swim in an immersion suit, practice turning our clothes into a floatation device, and some other survival things.  I felt very accomplished after flipping the raft over.  My partner and I were determined to do it fast and we showed up a number of the guys.  You know me...I have a bit of a competitive spirit!  Hope you enjoy the pictures. The first one is just the fire we had to put out. The second is of me after I climbed up onto the raft and then had to pull my partner up. The last one is the two of us in the process of flipping it over.

       

                        

Welcome!

 

Well, I have finally arrived to my new home!  After almost a month of training and feeling like I might never reach the ship, I am here and received quite the welcome as you can see from the video. It was a good time. All the ships crew were waiting for us when we arrived and lined the hallways and staircases as we came in, it was crazy!  We all gathered in the logos lounge where we were officially greeted and received our cabin keys and everything.  After dinner the party started!  We all met back in the logos lounge where the percussion team did a routine for us, we had cake and ice cream, watched a short drama, had some music, watched a group do a stomp/hip hop routine for us, and then everyone prayed for us. The crew lined up around the room and put their hands together up in the air creating a tunnel for us to walk through. As we made our way through the tunnel of people they prayed for us as we walked by.  It was really cool, and then we ended the night with a dance.  I have determined that the Logos Hope culture is a culture that loves to dance, all the more exciting for me!  We spent the rest of the evening doing all kinds of irish dances.  The only one I remember the name for was the Virginia Reel and I only remember it because I had done that dance before many many years ago at a soldiers ball.  The night was very tiring but we had a blast!  We are finishing our last week of training right now onboard the ship.  It is our basic safety training where we learn things like first aid, CPR, the different ship alarms and emergency procedures, fire safety skills, how to flip a life raft, how to turn our clothing into flotation devises in case of falling overboard or having to abandon ship, and all that other kind of fun stuff!  At the end of each day we are tested on the material we covered.  I actually have a day off on monday, one more day of training on tuesday when we will actually be getting into the lifeboats and lowering them down, and then I will be finding out my job and starting work on wednesday!  Be looking for pictures of my cabin and news on my job assignment in the next couple of weeks.  

Clear the Stage

You all need to go to youtube and listen to the song 'clear the stage' by Ross King.  It brought me to tears today.  Just listen to the words and allow God to speak to your heart through it.  I tried to post the link for you but for some reason its not working for me, so you'll have to take the initiative to check it out yourself.  Should be the third one down.  Its a great song!  Let me know what you think of it!

Missions Medina

A few days ago we had what they called a missions medina where we traveled around to different stations and got to see some of the customary dress, listen to music, try out instruments, look at pictures, and try some of the food from the various countries. Got a very small idea of what it would feel like to be a woman in this culture and just thought it would be a fun picture to post!

Mission Possible

So yesterday we did a 4 hour simulation called mission possible.  Once it was all over I was able to look back and appreciate it and learn from it and was able to say it was a lot of fun, but in the midst of it, it was a bit stressful.  There is no way I can convey to you exactly what took place or get you to feel the things we were feeling and experiencing but it went a little something like this:  I was with a team of 8 people from 6 different countries and our goal as a group was to reach the country of 'epohon' and to learn as much of the culture and the language as we could.  We were given a 'passport' and some 'money' and were sent out to acquire our visas.  It took me 3 tries before I could get my visa because as an american I had to have an invitation to enter the country.  I also had a bit of trouble because I had scribbled something out on my passport and was questioned about the reasoning for that.  I simply claimed that this was something that we all did in my country...that it was customary to scratch something out and they finally stamped my book and let me through:)  Next we had to get our 'plane ticket'  This part proved to be fairly easy for me.  Then we boarded our 'plane' (it was a bus) and were told to take the cloth on our headrests and blindfold ourselves because we were not allowed to see where we were going...interesting feeling!  Once we arrived at our destination, a couple guards came on board and checked everyone's passports and made us line up to prepare to make our way through customs and immigration.  When I reached the front of the line they asked to search my bag.  They questioned me about some things and then ended up pulling out a bag of 'crack' which someone must have planted on me sometime during the game.  So, needless to say they took me into custody and interrogated me for what seemed like forever.  It was a bit intimidating.  I was in a room by self with a couple of guards without much light and with lots of incense.  Once they found out that I was american I basically had to pay them off in order to be freed.  I considered myself lucky because some people actually got thrown into 'jail' for different things.  I finally was able to reach my destination and meet up with the rest of my team and we were taken to our host family.  We went into their 'house' and ate a meal with them and they spoke only in their language and we did the best we could to learn as much as possible.  I have to say I was a bit impressed with myself during this time with how much I was able to pick up on and communicate with them on.  After we had eaten the woman stood up and motioned to the rest of us girls to join her.  Her husband had turned on some music and we had to dance for the men while they continued to eat and talk with one another.  It was quite the experience.  Once it was all over we met together with a leader and spent some time debriefing as a group and sharing what went on in our heads through the whole thing and talked about what things we might actually encounter as we get ready to enter our host cultures.

Why Me?

“You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me.  Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is too high, I can not attain to it.  Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in your book were all written the days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them” (Ps. 139:5,6,16).  How comforting it is to know that God ordained these days for me before I was even formed.  He was behind me and He is before me preparing the way and preparing my heart for what only He knows is ahead.  What confidence I can have because of that.  I believe the Lord is going to reveal Himself to me and that I am going to see Him at work in ways I would not see if I were home.  I don’t think I will ever understand why He has chosen to use me in this way because I am not at all worthy to carry His name to the nations, but for some reason He has called me, and He will take the responsibility for making me capable to do His work.  It is all Him and nothing of me.  I am merely the vessel that He has chosen to act through.  I find it somewhat strange to think that this is my life now, and yet there’s something about it that feels so right.  I have left everyone I know and love behind and have found myself thrown into a world that I really know nothing of.  I am in a place of discovery…..discovering new countries, new people, new foods, new languages, new ways of thinking…..I am discovering and will continue to discover more of who God is and more of who I am and the desires that He has for me.  He is a God of unceasing wonders!

Mosbach, Germany

I don't have much time but I wanted to try to post a little something.  I have arrived safely in Mosbach and am almost totally adjusted to the time difference.  Thank you for all your prayers!  I am staying in a youth hostel that is about a 1.4 mile walk from 'the mill' (the main conference center).  I have 3 other girls in my room, one from Malaysia, one from England, and one from Holland.  Becca, you would love all the accents!  Its very beautiful here, a bit cold and snowy but nothing I'm not used to.  We went on a scavenger hunt in the actual town of Mosbach this afternoon.  Oddly enough my competitive side was overtaken by my curiosity and I got distracted with wandering around town and taking pictures rather than trying to find whatever it was I was supposed to find!  I felt like I was in a little snow globe village.  The architecture is very unique, different from anywhere else I've been.  The conference itself has been good so far, just getting started really but I am excited about joining the ship.  Pray pray pray on January 26th as that is the date the surveyor's are coming to inspect the ship and hopefully giving the passenger safety certification so that we can set sail within the first month of being there.  I believe the first stop that's scheduled is the UK, yah!  And after that rumors have it that we will either be sailing through the Caribbean or along the coast of Africa, I would be thrilled with either!  

Take Off

My adventure has begun.  Well, I suppose it started a while ago.  Its been a long process in getting this far but today its actually starting to feel real.  I am sitting in the Detroit airport waiting for my next flight, wishing I had a cup of coffee to sip on but not willing to give up my seat to go get one:)  I'm sitting in a nice comfy lounge chair in an area of the airport that happens to have free wifi.  Had a number of people see me off at the airport in Moline today.  Was tough to say goodbye but I am excited for what's ahead!  Next stop:  Frankfurt Germany where I will meet up with some of my fellow OM'ers and be directed where to go next.  This whole thing is as much a mystery to me as it is to you.  Feels kind of like one big scavenger hunt, except that I don't really know my final destination or how I will arrive there.  All I know is my next step, and that is boarding my plane with northwest airlines at 5:00pm today and unless some unknown event occurs I will be landing in Frankfort at about 7:30 tuesday morning!  Alright, now for the cup of coffee!

One Week!

Its hard to believe that one week from today I will be stepping on a plane to Germany with one bag, my backpack, and my guitar and not returning for the next 2 years, crazy! For those of you that may not yet be aware, I have joined Operation Mobilization and will be living and working on board one of their ships, the Logos Hope. Its been a long process to get me to this point and now that its finally here I have brief moments of panic when thinking about leaving all I know and love to venture into uncharted waters. There are so many unknowns, but then again that's what makes the whole thing that much more adventurous and exciting. I really feel confident that this is where the Lord wants me right now and He has done so many things to bring it all together in a way that only He could do. I pray that I can continue trusting Him to bring me safely to my destination and then wait in anticipation for all that I know He is going to teach me while I'm gone. What an awesome God we serve!